The
Christmas Present!
We will
pick up this story where “The 7 Days Before Christmas” finishes, and centre to
begin with on Wednesday 23rd December 2009. We have been back home
in our island home for 24 hours, and I am deep into work things; whilst Siu Ying
is cooking, cleaning house, visiting friends, and all that stuff. A normal day
really. Be Loi is into girl dog stuff, which apparently means eating anything
and everything. Around 10 PM I am feeling hungry, so Siu Ying cooks: gammon,
eggs and chips for me; whilst eating rice and cabbage herself. Finishing an
excellent meal, I watch a film and start to doze on the settee…
You would
think everything was perfectly normal, except for the fact Siu Ying had been
asking for infrequent and large amounts of money to visit the hospital for the
last few months. Concurrently, the small belly she had developed had continued
to grow in size, to the point where she was looking about 8-months pregnant.
She never mentioned this to me at all, and all my enquiries were met with a
total blank. Around friends she would wear a very baggy jacket, often with her
rucksack worn in front – which people presumed as her feeling cold and being
cautious because of theft. I know her well, and this is not what she normally
does. I had of course worked out what had happened, and when, and was quite
delighted + happy to play along with her game. Interestingly, the Mother of the
local shop asked me about 1-month before when the baby was due. I just said I
didn’t know; but was wiley enough to know experienced Mother’s do not miss very
much at all concerning babies.
Thursday (Christmas Eve 2010)
It was just
after midnight, and not a mouse was stirring – when Siu Ying came in clutching
her belly and stated “I need to be in the Hospital now!” This is a problem my wife has, and boys are very good at
solving real problems. I tell her to pack and leave home within 2 minutes,
whilst calling Paul to help us on the other side of the river. Her contractions
are within 10 minutes of each other at this point in our time.
We both
grab essentials only, and exit about 1-minute later. I empty any human food we
have into Be Loi’s food tray whilst rushing out of the door. We gambol with
haste to the ferry, which is closed for the night. Siu Ying is ok to begin with,
until another contraction hits her, and I start timing these with my internal
‘Boy clock’ – which I never knew existed before this moment. We stop for a
couple of minutes along the dark alleyway as she regains her breath and equilibrium.
We start again as she is telling me she
needs to go to a special women’s hospital in Foshan. Then just before the ferry
(And this is about half a mile walking briskly), she has another contraction.
Crikey!
My
‘Boy-clock’ registers this as about 5-minute intervals, and I sense the need to
hurry and do whatever it takes. There is a mode people slip into when required,
which can best be summed up by the phrase ‘Use your ingenuity’. I can be quite
ingenious when I need to be!
Reaching
the ferry about half past midnight, we both holler for assistance. The crew
sleeps aboard (And actually offer 24 hour service, for a large premium and
normally booked in advance). This is an emergency, so after they work out we
are serious, the whole team assembles and we get the fastest possible crossing
for Y100 = less than ten quid. Obviously they learn why we need to cross at
this time of night, and also learn of Siu Ying’s current disposition.
We are left
to our personal thoughts during the crossing, as the world we live in as a
couple is about to change radically. I shut out the clutter seeking my minds
attention, and instead focus on the wind of change that is apparently wafting
over the mighty
Siu Ying
cannot sit down, but is not much good at standing either. Another contraction
hits her before we reach shore, and then as this is subsiding, another hits
just after we disembark. My internal ‘Boys clock’ is now registering three
minutes between contractions, and I teach her to take deep breaths – something
that helps immensely, and also something she is amazed I know about.
Reaching
the top of the ferry ramp, I look right only to see Paul’s car immediately
arriving. Spot on! He must really have moved to get here so quickly!
Being a
very good friend of ours, he has also worked out Siu Ying’s condition, and
knows exactly what to do now – being a Father himself. Siu Ying says she needs
to go to the special women’s hospital she is registered with in Foshan. Paul is
inclined to head for the local hospital, whilst I over-ride and specify Shunde
Long Jiang hospital. Paul drives very safely, and very quickly. Our hearts warm
in the knowledge that in our hour of need, we are in very safe hands.
The thirty
minute day trip takes less than 15 minutes, and we soon arrive at Long Jiang
hospital. I know that both Paul and I had been worrying about her waters
breaking whilst in the car, or having to deliver on the roadside. However we
made it in time, just! Abandoning the car outside of the main entrance, we
scoop up Siu Ying, who is now suffering a virtual permanent series of
contractions, and physically carry her between us into the main reception.
There are several staff available at check-in, and no need to wait. Paul leads
and I back him up whilst Siu Ying hobbles about behind us. We register using
her ID card, and then after a short wait for paperwork formalities to be
completed. I am asked to pay my bill, which is Y2, 100, and I do not have the
cash just now. First we try my “International Visa Card”, only for it to be
rejected because they don’t do “International Visa cards” here. Fine! I then
try my Bank of China card, but muddle the pin twice = I never use the thing! I
am given one last go, and get the pin number right this time = Phew! Then we
are given receipts in triplicate (A Chinese thingymagig), which we will need to
change for a permanent registration tomorrow. Then we are sent across the room
to buy medicines. With this dealt with immediately, we now head off,
destination = Maternity Ward and Delivery Room.
Siu Ying is
now in a bad way, and contractions are within one minute! Paul and I carry her
by her armpits into Maternity ward where we are greeted by a great girl that
would not have a position in a western medical facility. I would term her as
Matron, or trainee doctor = somebody who knows exactly what is what, as has the
power to sort out the situation immediately, and without referral. Siu Ying is
placed instantly on a trolley, and then taken to a ‘No-go’ area for boys. How
do I know this – well, I tried to take a peak and got chased out : -)
We are told
to go and sort out ward paperwork – so off we go. We hand over suitable
paperwork + receipts, and are immediately included on the ‘bona fids’ listings.
After completing formalities, we linger around the place we last saw Siu Ying.
I perch on a vacant trolley, only to be shooed off by a protégé Matron. I was
up for going to sleep on that – had time and circumstance been different.
Ho-hum! Paul then removes his car to the doctors car park (its ok), whilst I
drag on nicotine hits in the outside waiting area.
Returning
to the 3rd floor, we are witness to the fact that Siu Ying has
disappeared into their system. Then there is a flurry of activity, and Siu Ying
comes out on a trolley with our girl baby in an attached wheelie carrycot
thingymagig. For sure, all this only took 15 minutes, and we now have a small
thing that is my personal responsibility, for life. She is very ‘cute’!
We get to
follow the trolley with SY aboard, which is moving extremely quickly I might add.
Obviously staff know where they are going, we do not, and tag along with due
haste whilst trying to assemble the stuff we brought with us into ‘carry mode’.
We arrive at room A 44-45, and Siu Ying is put in bed 46. She immediately wants
to hold the baby, which I bring for her. I notice she already has an identity
wristband, and later its partner is put into a holder at the foot of her bed. Staff
are in attendance for some time, ensuring everything is ok. Paul remembers that
when his wife gave birth, she was very hungry – so he goes to find food at what
is now 2AM. Staff then arrive to do a Mother and Baby check, so I disappear for
a smoke downstairs and outside. Half way through, Paul arrives back carrying
Big Mac’s and coffees. I am not a MacDonald’s fan, but this hits the spot
nicely for me. Siu Ying cannot have coffee, and will drink hot water almost
exclusively for the next month. I enjoy one of the coffees. Paul then decides
that what Siu Ying actually needs is Chinese food, so we head of to his home
which is only 5-minutes walk away. I take with me one Big Mac with the other
being saved for later. Paul prefers to get his car home and a short while later
we arrive outside of the side gates to the Garden (Condominium) I first lived
in when I came out to
Paul lives
in a new block they were just completing when I left for residence in Foshan,
which is next door to my old gaff. I start getting bits of reverse ‘de je vu’!
Paul’s home is a three bedroomed gaff and very nicely appointed. We go up in
one of the two lifts, and Paul points out that there is no floor number 14 –
apparently this is due to local superstitions. I like this home a lot. I am
seated at the dining table after first removing my shoes, as is customary in
My Dad is
delighted to hear from me, and we briefly discuss his health and knee and
things. However, he is curious to know why I should choose now to ring him. I
have great pleasure in breaking the news to this 89-year old, that he is
finally a Grandfather! He is stunned, and the British word for this is
‘Gob-smacked’! The tone of his voice changes immediately, and I can tell he is
well made-up. As conversation developes, he goes into ‘Knowing-Father’ mode,
and starts regaling me about the things that young boy children do … so that
would have been me then, uh! He is finding this highly amusing, whilst I
shudder and hold my head in my hands. Thanks Dad! I think he has been longing
to say these things for many years, but it is all in fun and bonding. I tell
him I must ring my Sister to tell her the news, but he says she is out
delivering Christmas cards – as if; I bet she’s down the pub having a beer with
Steve. She will probably be handing out Christmas cards to patrons of course,
but I keep her secret safe (Until now hahaha!).
As we are
saying our goodbyes, Paul appears in the main room, indicating it is time to
depart. We leave the complex on foot via by the other side gate, and one I have
used many times previously. This is serious time-warp, and a very nice place to
live when all said and done!
Within
5-minutes we are back at Siu Ying’s bedside, and a nurse pops in to bring her
fresh hot water in a large thermos flask. Paul has basically cooked her a
pot-noodle, with omelette and rice + some special herbs and tonic especially
for new Mothers. I sit down, and she dumps the Baby in my lap. Crikey! Not
really having a clue what to do with it, except for supporting her head (Neck)
– where did that come from? I then take a proper peak at this new creation of
ours, and say “Hello Rhiannon”. Blimey! I really do not have any idea where
that name came from, but it seems it is hers now. We decide that this is cool,
and that I will give her second name as ‘Dorothea’ in honour of my Mother.
Well, that’s that all sorted then! Beautiful actually, as there will be an ‘r’
in each of her names – just to add confusion in the future, as Cantonese people
generally have great difficulty pronouncing this letter. Me, that cruel – not
really. I later research the name and am very happy with it. I also find a
suitable nickname ‘Nonni’ (As in ‘Non’). So - Nonni Morris it is then.
Meanwhile,
Siu Ying has already worked out that I don’t really have a clue about babies;
so quickly finishing her meal, she extracts this small thing from my arms with
a lot of Cantonese words I don’t understand, and they go back to bed. Paul is
laughing. I know what she meant. Paul and I talk about tomorrow, and Siu Ying
falls asleep. I don’t think Nonni has been awake yet actually. It is 4 AM, and
so I persuade Paul that we are fine, and thank him profusely for all his help
tonight – as without him I am not sure what would have happened. He leaves
stating he will call Uncle at 9AM, so that Anne can go baby shopping for Siu
Ying = we have nothing except a hospital wrap, and she needs clothing and
associated things newly born require.
I try to
sleep in the hospital chair, but this will not happen. I briefly consider the
floor, and before I know it the time is 7AM, so time for a cigarette. One the
way out I espy the food trolley making its rounds. Returning briefly, I ask SY
if she want’s something to eat, and she replies to the positive, but with
little enthusiasm. Inspecting the goods, I find that there is a large pot of
Sik Juk (Rice Porridge), which looks just like it is made from water and rice =
no good. Of course it is actually made from water and rice, but in comparison,
it’s a bit like saying baked beans are made from tomatoes and Soya beans, and
then combining the two as they are and serving. Uggg! They also proffer an
assortment of Chinese sweet breads, which look a little the worse for wear.
Basically this stuff is wholesome and nourishing – and very cheap. I pass, and
tell SY why. She is not really hungry anyways and agrees with my decision, although
I do offer to buy for her from the awakening street vendors, which she
declines. Trying again I make it outside to the nearest outside door which also
has a bench adjacent, and as I take up residency just as Security comes over
for a look at the nearby motorcycles. He says ‘Hello’ in good English, although
it is probably the only word he knows. I offer him a cigarette, which is
gratefully accepted, and then we have a brief chat in local Cantonese before he
gets back to work again. I watch a new day dawning and I ponder about life…
Christmas Eve - Daytime
8.20 will
find me in the same seat again, and I conclude Paul will be exhausted, so I
decide to ring Uncle Sam for some support over the next few hours. The girls
are still asleep upstairs, so it is my job to look out for them and any immediate
contingencies. Uncle is really happy to receive the news, so he + Anne are on
their way! Anne is his elder Brother’s, Wife’s Sister – or something like that.
In Irish that would be a ‘Second cousin once removed … or is it a First cousin
twice removed? I never did get the hang of that stuff, as most of my Mothers
family seemed to be second cousins three times removed. Durrr-what?’
Regardless, Anne is a very good friend to us (Although she has yet to bear any
children). I head back to the room to check on the girls – who are both still
fast asleep. I also worry about my other girl (Be Loi), as she is home alone
without understanding; except for knowing something every important happened
last night.
I spend a
long time watching them sleeping, and then the draw for nicotine approaches
again. I wait until 9.50 before heading out for an indulgence, in the hopes of
also greeting Uncle and Anne. It appears my timing is perfect, but my location
not; as my mobile rings and it is Uncle on the line. He says: ‘Where are you
now’, and I reply, ‘Downstairs waiting for you. Where are you?’ He says. ‘I am
with your wife and baby’. Shucks – he came in one of the other ways!
Reaching
the room that we share with another couple by the way, I am greeted by Uncle
whilst Anne is busy saying ‘goo-goo-goo’ to Nonni. Must be a ‘girl’
thingymagig? Uncle gives me some fatherly advice, and then we head out shopping
for baby clothes. In my mind we will head for the nearby new plaza, or the
street market behind. Nope! Uncle says Anne knows just the place in Lat Lao
(Lei Liu), which is also where they live. OK, so we pile into Uncle’s school
bus charabanc thingymagig and travel 5 miles to the nearest smaller town. We
park outside a Mall, which is really a supermarket that doesn’t sell
everything, but appears to specialise in toilet tissue and baby gizmos =
Probably a Bull’s Eye then.
I
unwittingly grab a basket on the way in, which is soon replaced by a regular
trolley, as items are thrown in with gay abandon. Seeing this is about to
overflow quite soon, a Manageress rocks up with a ‘Thunderbird 2’ sized trolley.
I am aware we do need toilet tissue – which is used for everything in
I find
Uncle and Anne looking at Baby Bottles with the Supervisor, so presume this is
in hand (Mistake), and sortie the piles of towels instead. I add a face flannel
and two small hand towels before Anne rocks up and adds a beach towel = good
thinking. The largest trolley is overflowing by now, so we leave this with
staff and head upstairs to buy baby clothing. The assistant is great, and
immediately shows us to a rack for small people of 6-months and above. Anne
states we need clothing for a 1-day old baby – which they don’t stock.
Retracing our steps we find uncle guarding the trolley below. We head for the
checkout and Uncle has a new plan. He is also determined to pay for this, so I
play devils advocate and get them embroiled in a conversation – whilst I sneak
in and pay the tab hehe!
They are
not happy with me, but I have done good. We depart with four of the largest
carrier bags this place has to offer, and embarking the charabanc, head off for
somewhere else…
Uncle
drives us around the corner, and then parks on the wrong side of the road,
facing the wrong way, at a set of traffic lights – but fortunately in a bus
stop.
Back to the
street, back to the charabanc, and back to the hospital!
Uncle drops
us off on the street opposite the hospital, as he has a business lunch to
attend with an investor – which I should have been at also … circumstances
permitting. Instead I really do need to check on this new thing in my life,
again. Rhiannon. Hmmm - our Baby!
Anyways, we
arrive back at the hospital, and I show Anne the quick way in. Siu Ying is
trying ‘breast-feeding’ for the first time, and we cuddle and canoodle about
this, as Nonni is not into it and asleep again. That’s OK! We set about
unpacking our purchases, and then I examine the other Big Mac. I have just
about convinced myself I could eat this if I had too, when Anne tells me Paul
is cooking lunch for us. Top Hole!
‘Speak of
the Devil, and he will appear to you!’ or so the saying goes. Well, Paul is
actually an angel, but he rings up at this moment so say he will be bringing
hot food for Siu Ying later. He says it is time for Anne and myself to join him
for dinner. Siu Ying and Nonni are ready for sleep, so we adjourn to Paul’s
gaff for luncheon.
Anne and
myself walk the short distance to his place. Entering the lobby we just catch
the lift, as this is held for us by a charming older woman. I point out to Anne
in bad Cantonese, about the missing floor number 14, and the woman then
explains in greater detail to Anne in Mandarin. We are all headed for floor 10,
and then we go to the same apartment! Ahha! You must be Paul’s Mother then
hahaha! Small world! Paul’s son lets us in, but he is a little shy to speak
directly to me at first. It seems he spoke Cantonese until he was 7 years old,
but for the last year or so has only been speaking Mandarin. His choice
apparently, and I’m not altogether sure his Father is 100% happy with this, but
it is ok. I then shatter things for the young lad by asking stupid questions in
English, and then repeating them in Cantonese – like ‘What’s your name’ etc. He
is a bit thrown by this, but it is in fun and breaking the ice, as I am the
first foreigner he has ever met. He begins answering in Mandarin, and we all
howl with laughter. Also present is Paul’s Father, who retired from being a
Doctor several years ago. He does speak some Cantonese, but I think his wife
does not. I drink Chinese tea with ‘Baba’ whilst ‘Mama’ gets out stacks of
peanuts and then cuts up some oranges. Meanwhile Paul is on cooking duty for
the whole family today.
A short
time later Paul’s wife arrives and we say hello’s in English, with smattering
of Cantonese in support. She is a Teacher and one of those happy and outgoing
people who are very well suited for this profession. Paul then dishes up
special foods for Siu Ying, which are put into a large thermos type container
most suitable for the purpose. Anne and Paul’s wife then take this concoction
to Siu Ying in the hospital, whilst I chat, drink tea, and enjoy some nicotine.
The dining table is set and many dishes placed upon it. We wait for Paul to
finish cooking and then all tuck in. The girls are away a very long time, but
eventually return about half way through. Of all the dishes I especially like
two of them: a spicy beef thingymagig and something related to pork with a
nifty sauce in gravy style.
As the meal
finishes, Paul’s wife rushes out, only to return 10 minutes later with a
carrier bag full of assorted and recently washed baby clothes. They have come
from the school she teaches in and one of them has a 1-year old, so these are
given to us – and most of them are extremely useful! After Paul’s wife
personally checks all the contents, we head off back to the hospital. Nonni is
awake and feeding, and Siu Ying has little time to examine the proffered gifts.
Doubtless given time, we will be doing likewise for another newborn. Then it is
time to change the baby, and Paul’s wife is like a true professional, knowing
exactly what to do and how to handle young babies. However, she is also making
sure Siu Ying understands the important stuff and this turns into a brief
crash-course in rearing a baby. She then gives SY her mobile number for contact
if she has a problem of any kind. These two girls only met for the first time a
few hours ago, and now appear to be the best of buddies. Amazing! However, the
clock is ticking and Anne is first to leave. Paul and I soon follow, whilst his
wife remains behind to comfort and teach Siu Ying.
I head back
to the island, with Paul very kindly giving me a lift to the ferry point. He
has been a stalwart and I am so very pleased to know he considers us true
friends. How lucky we are! He leaves quickly as he also has his own life to
lead. I have a wait for the ferry and contemplate life = I am actually
extremely happy!
Of course,
when the ferry does arrive I get interrogated by the crew hahaha! I tell them
we have a baby girl and everyone is delighted for our joy. My Cantonese is not
quite up to this, so one of the more outgoing deck hands involves a nice guy
called Kevin in our conversation. He has excellent English and works for the
Agricultural Bank of
Kevin drops
me at my door and we vaguely arrange to meet sometime later. I am greeted by a
very concerned Be Loi, who is really into companionship and food. She is
worried about why Siu Ying is not home yet, but seems to understand it may be a
while – so how does that work then? This confirms my belief that there is an awful
lot more to ‘communication’ than simply learning a language such as English.
Perhaps I should shift focus and try teaching ‘Dog Speaking’?
After a
hefty meal and making time to play with her; I notice she has grown up – and
also grown a lot physically. Her general demeanour is now older somehow, as if
she has passed some dog rites of passage. She is quite a clever dog actually,
and at about 4-months old, is already fluent in both English and Cantonese
apparently! Like I said above, there is a lot more to communication that
getting grammar correct. I put important washing into the washing machine, to
return to my wife when dry; and also remember to take it out to hang once the
cycles are completed! I am a very ‘Good boy’ I think : -)
Retiring to
my office, I finally shut out the world and have time to spare for myself. But
first, I answer emails and make a good attempt at clearing my desk. If Siu Ying
had been reticent about telling anyone she was pregnant (Including yours
truly), then I take the opposite approach to life, so spend a couple of hours
emailing people and speaking to others on the telephone – basically sharing our
good news. I crack a celebratory beer, and then get half way down the next
before total fatigue hits me and I crash out on the settee – well, I have been
awake for around 47 hours now.
Friday (Christmas Day):
I awake
around 6am and head out for a Sik Juk; taking Be Loi with me for a treat (She
needs inclusion to avoid any nasty surprises later on). She is fine and loves
the adventure. Returning I decide to be a tad selfish – as being in a hospital
really isn’t my thing at all … I have spent too many hours in these places over
years past, and don’t like them a lot. Mind you, the Chinese ones do appear to
be far more efficient that their
Later I am
back in my office, when the telephone starts ringing and emails start arriving.
Amongst them are some quite important business ones concerning our projects in
Damn, it is
Christmas Day in
Both Uncle
and Paul call to tell me I must go to be with Siu Ying tonight – but I know
even they have difficulties making this particular trip via public transport.
And it isn’t so much that it is not available because it is. But catching a
series of buses when your start and finish points are mid-route is not
something I am good at. I work out the most sensible way is via motorbike taxi
and fixing the deal, which I can do in both Mandarin and Cantonese. Sorted -
should I choose to take this option? OK. I heed their advice, but as the girls
will both be asleep in hospital, and I will not get to sleep again in the
uncomfy chair + have nothing to do there and lots to do at home … I ring my
wife – who is asleep and doesn’t answer the phone. I research the name
‘Rhiannon’ on the internet and am pleasantly surprised. Cool! That’s settled
then.
Siu Ying
rings and we are cool. She would like me there for emotional support, but
understands I now need to provide a living for them both. We txt during the
time we are apart, and love blossoms once again
Boxing Day 2009
What a
stupid name to call a day! In case you ever wondered (Especially for my
international readers), this does not refer to any forms of pugilism; but
instead refers to the Victorian practice of ‘alms’, or giving too the poor.
These would be packages of food and clothing etc, which are put in a ‘Box’ and
handed out to the beggars and poor families within ones immediate environment.
It is 6.30
and Uncle (A devout Buddhist) calls to tell me that an Angel just visited him
and woke him from his slumbers. It seems Nonni is a very special child (Of
course!), and that she has been given a very special name by this Angel. (They
do exist btw, although most modern religions denigrate their importance in
favour of selling their political beliefs and systems of control to unwitting
followers of their creed). Uncle then tells me they have given him a name for
Nonni, and that name is ‘Angel’. I guessed we missed something in translation
here, but I fully understand his reference point – later confirmed by my Sister
(Roo, who is a Sharman). Therefore I know that a Chinese Angel has given Nonni
a special name, but simplifying this to ‘Angle’ is not correct. I therefore
need to find her real Angel name, and Roo points me in the right direction of
course. Seems I know a bit about this stuff also! Maybe later I will let
Rhiannon research this herself, as it is more a ‘Rights of Passage’
thingymagig. However, Roo is well impressed that Nonni already has a Guardian
Angel who is proactive in these matters.
I, by this
time, am on the point of a ‘Bacardi Moment’, but resist the temptation as I do
need to see my girls later today.
Uncle calls
again to say Paul will pick me up later this afternoon and take me to the
hospital. Paul then rings and informs me he has cooked special food for Siu
Ying’s lunch, and she is eating it ‘Now!’ I chat with her and ensure all is
well. Paul then fixes a time for him to collect me, and my life then becomes that
of others…
Leaving a
slightly bewildered Be Loi with ample food, I head off to catch the 11.50 ferry
to the mainland. I have washed and packed everything I can think of + some
treats for my wife. I do not contest that I will have overlooked something of
importance, but I am a boy doing what I think is best and needed at this point
in time. Paul is waiting for me, and we depart, only to arrive quickly at the
hospital a short time later. We again park in the Doctors car park, and Paul
comes in for a quick visit. Siu Ying is breast feeding as we enter, and Nonni
is now into it in a big way! I notice there is another girl in the other bed,
and this one is local and speaks Cantonese + it turns out this is her third
child, and she offers bountiful advice which SY gladly accepts. That said this
girl actually keeps to herself a lot, and only buts in when it is apparent we
don’t know what to do. Excellent! Paul soon departs, but will return shortly.
Anne and I
then slip outside and try to fathom between us the weird process of exchanging
our temporary overnight receipt for a processed one. Apparently the nurses have
been giving Siu Ying small grief about this. I am also keen to retrieve Siu
Ying’s black flip-flops which disappeared during delivery, but I appear to be
the only one interested – despite the fact the tiled floors so ideal for hot
summers, are now damned cold. Eventually somebody points us in the right
direction after much ‘too-ing and fro-ing’.
Entering the corridor once again I see Paul and his son coming towards
me complete with many gifts and a large red plastic bucket - inside of which is
Siu Ying’s luncheon. She is under strict orders to eat everything, which is
Toisan chicken = wonderful! Meanwhile Paul appears to be the only other person
in this room that knows what to do with a new baby. I watch him closely and
learn a few tips, then try it myself. Maybe I could get the hang of this
actually! And that really is a scary thought. Timely Anne takes over, whilst
Paul shows me where to get more hot water.
Paul then
leaves to take his son to see a Doctor, whilst Anne and myself set out with
determination to process the said form. Exiting the lift on the ground floor,
Anne heads off in the direction she knows, but I over-rule her and take the
short cut. Blimey! Anne then drops in line at another receipts and payments
point, which is a lot less congested than I imagine the main foyer one to be.
Handily placed outside is my favourite smoking bench, so I indulge. Paul and
his son soon join me, as it appears there is no Doctor today – which would
probably be … Sunday?
Anne then
drags me off to join the small queue, which I am mindful to exclude (Politely)
other people trying to jump the queue. Must be a British thingymagig hehe!
Processing takes about 40 seconds, and then we wait for a moment at the far
window, which is the collection point. Paul then goes off to retrieve his red
plastic bucket from Siu Ying, whilst Anne and I set about the ward office
again. There is a lot of speaking in various forms of Cantonese and Mandarin. I
am of the opinion that something isn’t right, but my worries are eventually
proved groundless. Finding one local nurse who speaks Cantonese, I personally
enquire about SY’s black flip-flops. Then Anne and the Doctor, (who isn’t quite
– and the same one still on duty, or so it appears), get involved, and
subsequently another staff is called. She is spoken to, and goes off to
reappear 30 seconds later with Siu Ying’s footwear. Ahha! That simple then : -)
Anne then
departs and I am left alone with my new family for a few hours’ enjoyment and
bonding. Paul drops by around 7.30 with dinner for Siu Ying – what a star!
There is a period of small chaos, as the other mother’s family arrive, whilst
Nonni awakens for feeding and changing. This flurry does not last more than an
hour, and then after people have departed, Siu Ying asks a Nurse to bring me a
bed to sleep on. I am taken to a storeroom at the end of the corridor, and help
the nurse carry back a fold-up bed. Siu Ying is not impressed, as it is only
2-feet wide and I am ‘An Elephant’. The nurse then takes these away and returns
with 4 small treadle type supports and two large pieces of wood. These make
something about the size of a
You will
have inferred there are no ‘visiting hours’ for Maternity in Chinese hospitals
= they expect the whole family and friends to be there 24 hours, and accept
this. How stupid are our Western systems of time-management in this area?
My day
begins at about 3.30 AM, when Nonni requests food from my happy and exhausted
wife. The there is coo-ing and baby changing, before I get hungry, and not
really knowing when it was I last ate – head out for some eats around 5AM. No
problem – Here is
First I
fill Siu Ying’s glass with hot water, and emptying the flask go to top it up.
Apparently the room for boiling hot water that Paul showed me is now closed and
locked. I am a bit put out by this, exacerbated by the fact that the only staff
available at this hour only speak Mandarin. Ho-hum! I return with an empty
flask and a query in my mind.
Out on the
streets people are clearing away the rubbish left from last night’s local
concert. Sure, the 24 hour MacDonald’s next door is the only place open – but I
need coffee and something in my stomach, so it is cool. The person behind the
serving counter has a brief look of concern as I enter, and quickly reaches for
their full menu. Expecting me to speak English, and if not – then Mandarin, I
order fluently in Cantonese. She is a bit shell-shocked by this, as it is the
local Cantonese version for this small town. We then chat amiably about all and
nothing, and she tells me my pronunciation is perfect! I don’t quite think so,
but it is pretty good and took me a lot of work to get to this point. She has
about the same level of English that I do Cantonese, so the two languages
become a pleasant mix as we converse; meanwhile she prepares my coffee and
food. Excellent MacDonald’s! And I mean that.
By 5.30 I
am seated with waitress service for a very large and agreeable coffee, a
quarter-pounder (Oh how I wish this was a Wimpey), and excellent ‘fries’.
Cracking! The floor is awash with water, as one poor girl spends hours cleaning
it with first a scrubbing brush, and then some apparatus more suited to cleaning
windows. I note she is working hard, and that’s all I note. Finishing I go
outside for a cigarette and consider my new responsibilities. I love Siu Ying
because she is always full of surprises = life is never boring with her and we
suit extremely well. This new baby is just an example of our life together and
I love her for this. My thoughts turn to what she needs, and so returning
inside I order 2 x coffees’s to go + 2 x hot waters to go.
I make it
back to the ward at just after 6AM, and am told by staff that the hot water is
now working again. I pass by thanking them in the process, and entering our
room am greeted to the sight of Siu Ying breast feeding again. I give her a
MacDonald’s hot water and set about another coffee for myself. Our plans for today
are quite open, as she should be released all being well. This does depend upon
Doctor’s checks and permissions etc, but all is looking great so far and so I
don’t worry too much.
At 9.30 I
head out for the local mall in order to acquire some baby stuff we will need
once back home. It appears that when Uncle and Anne bought the feeding bottle,
it was for older babies, complete with internal gismo’s to promote the sucking
action response. This basically stops a new born being able to suck from the bottle,
and there does not appear to be any way to disconnect the associated internal
tubes and fandangle’s. I expect this mall to open at 10AM, and am not
disappointed. Therefore I kill time and find exactly the bottle Nonni needs in
a Mickey Mouse shop. For British readers I should point out that this is
actually a shop that sells Mickey Mouse paraphernalia, and not the other
meaning of this phrase. Objective Number One sorted then!
I amble
around and get into one of the two actual malls. Reaching the third floor in
order to kill time, I enter a Vanguard supermarket – which is just awakening.
There is a girl on checkout; and many staff working on shifting the products
around, presumably so regular shoppers won’t be able to find what they want to
buy, and leave to buy these same products elsewhere … well, that’s what I do! I
find the doggy section and put a large bag of biscuits + three tins of dog food
into my basket. Entering the next isle I am greeted by an assistant stacking
shelves, who says “Good Morning” to me in good English. I reply in Cantonese
and we laugh. I stock up with boy-food-ingredients such as tinned pork in gravy
and Baked Beans. This place does not sell bread in any western form, so I add
to my basket some treats for Siu Ying and baby, and check-out.
Returning
to street level I hit the Disney store and pay ten times too much for a baby
bottle fit for a three-day old. I choose the Winnie the Pooh version, and am
happy I have accomplished my mission. I return to hospital to find Anne in attendance
and doing a lot for Siu Ying. She has also given her time freely, and I wonder
if she is also in need of her own baby. It seems I missed the Doctor’s visit,
but everything is ok, so we can leave after formalities are completed. These
appear to include: A Nurse giving the baby a thorough bath in a special room. I
take her there, but am then shut out as professionals go to work. Nonni also
has a sample taken for blood testing, the results of which will be rung through
in a few days time to Siu Ying. Discharge is mainly done through Nurses and
admin people coming into the room, and when Nonni is bathed, we are about ready
to leave. Paul rocks-up and we leave, basically just saying ‘Goodbye’ to the
staff, as all is previously sorted.
Next week
we will have to see the Doctor personally for issue of the Birth Certificate,
collect some medicines for Nonni, and receive the results of the blood test by
telephone. Sorted!
We exit
under the green light, and head for home. Paul’s son is again with us and Anne
accompanies us also. They are very concerned we will not have enough food, so
Paul swings by the local wet market where we purchase many things – like 5
trays of eggs, fish, chickens, fruit and vegetables. I go off and buy some
excellent pork for ‘English cooking’ whilst I have the chance (Freezer bound),
and Paul buys rare and exotic versions of Chinese potatoes (Or is that yams, or
sweet potatoes?). I have no idea, and neither does Siu Ying actually. However,
we rest assured that somebody sometime will actually know what these things
are, and how to cook them. Apparently these are very special for new Mother’s
and used to regain a healthy libido. Hmmm. Libido – I still have one of those…
I go off
searching for large cartons of fresh milk, whilst Paul returns to the car. It
is raining quite hard by now, but I keep to the sheltered awnings and continue
my search. I find fresh milk in cartons of 24 x 250 cc, and 16 x 330 cc’s. They
do not do the 1-litre ones, which are ideal for a coffee drinker such as myself
+ a lot cheaper. No problem, but at least I tried.
We reach
the ferry, which has just left, so have almost a full hour to kill. We all go
into the ferry-head restaurant except Siu Ying, who is part tired and part
hiding form public scrutiny. Paul orders a large stir-fry with pork for us, and
similar with ‘Dofu’ for Anne (Who is vegetarian). I tell the staff about our
new baby - so they all pile out to Paul’s car to ‘Look-check-see’. Siu Ying is
not amused, but this is something she has to get used to, for sure. Too soon I
notice vehicles and people exiting the ferry rampart, and know it is time for
us to leave. We take all food back in a ‘doggy-bag’, which Be Loi will consume
later.
Paul drives
his car with all aboard onto the ferry, and within a few minutes later we park
outside our island home. Be Loi is going nuts whilst we try to evacuate his
boot of tons of shopping and gifts. Inclusion is important, so whilst Siu Ying
does her rightful thing with Nonni, the others unpack stuff; and I choose to
spend a small quality time with Be Loi (She is also a very central part of out
family don’t forget); and then feed her.
Paul and
Anne choose to stay with us whilst several ferries come and go. Anne cleans the
house and Paul offers great advice and moves things around to suit Siu Ying.
What fantastic friends we have!
In between
our efforts, Siu Ying and Nonni slip ‘almost unnoticed’ into our bedroom, where
they finally garner peace and tranquillity. I leave them to sleep and wait for
their new day in our island home. By this time I have simply become a decision
maker as to what Paul and Anne do, or don’t do. I have my wife and newborn safe
in our bed, the home is looking pristine, and I have friends who have
sacrificed so very much to make this easy for us … and this is why I love
Paul and
Anne depart, and I head immediately into our bedroom to watch these two
fascinating creatures sleeping. I guess I am there for several hours just
watching and looking out for them. I then need to include the other member of
our household, who got shut outside in the rain. Be Loi promptly arrives to my
call, suitably dry and warm – I’m not sure how she does this, but it has
something to do with our Chinese cabbage patch for sure. Giving her inclusion,
I drift off to sleep on the sofa…
I do feel
the very strong urge to write about this – not because I am now a Father, but
because I need to tell people about how life really is in modern
Obviously I
am not a literary genius, but these small missives serve to tell of my life
through my own eyes, as I live it day by day.
Thank you
for sharing, and may your god walk with you
To be
continued…